Music Is A Time Machine

So I finally decided to get a song list on my page. If it is annoying well then turn it off... :)

It is funny because as I was going through the songs I was amazed at how these songs all took me back to different times in my life or at least made me think of different people. Even if things have changed so much that you don't feel like the same person from that time, the sound and the words bring back such a huge emotion inside.

Right now I am listening to "Beauty and The Beast" by Stevie Nicks as I am writing this. I have a huge heaviness in my heart. This was a song that I played over and over again after my first real heart-breaking break-up. Believe me, I am very happy I am not with that man.... I would have never been happy or the person I am today. Sean is the only one that could ever love me the way I need to be loved. I don't think, no, I know I have never loved anyone the way I love him. However, the song still hits me in a spot...

It is like a time warp. I can see vividly things in my head as the songs play. I know that this happens to everyone. Certain songs will take us back to a place in our mind that we have never thought about for a long time. Like the song by the Bloodhound Gang called "The Roof is on Fire" (which due to a lot of bad language and stuff is not on my play list) makes me remember closing at Target in electronics laughing my butt of with Jon Peters. My very favorite memory of him. Different songs that I used to play when Aubree was born make me see her as a baby. Old country songs take me back to when my family used to get together to play guitars and attempt to sing.

Other songs just stir up the emotions. There are songs that are exclusive to my thoughts and feelings for Sean that I am sure he would wonder why those particular songs represent him in my mind.

Of all the songs on my play list one that seems to sum up everything. It is strange because I actually had a dream the other night where this was playing. It is not a song that many people are familiar with. The artist is Judy Collins, which will always remind me of my mother because she used to sing all of her songs and did such a great job. The song "In My Life" which talks about her past and how much the people and places meant to her. Even though her past is looked back on fondly, the person she is in love with now is more than anything she had. I think it is true because your love, hurt, good, bad, gains, loses and so forth make you who you are. Later you will look back at them with different eyes, but usually the same feelings. However, I look at the ones in my life now and know this is where I wanted and dreamed of being. I love them all more.... especially my kids and my Sean.