Black Friday - Fun and Frustration

As a veteran retail worker this day still brings floods of memories... like flash backs.   I worked retail for 12 years, 10 at Target (1995-2005) and 2 at Musicland (1992-1995).

I can honestly say that there was nothing more fun then the first few hours of that Friday morning.  Watching people run like it was some sort of game show they were on.  The smart ones left their children and the elderly home to avoid losing part of their group.  As the employees you knew you stayed out of the way for the first 20 to 30 minutes and then manned your station.  All the while wondering why you were not trained by the SWAT team in riot and crowd control tactics.

I am a survivor of the Tickle Me Elmo, Ferbies, Nintendo 64, PlayStation 2, and other "newest" or "hottest" item of the year.  I remember with the stupid Ferbie frenzies that right before the front doors were open some yelled that all the Ferbies were in the Lingerie department.  Herds of people ran over to the Lingerie department shoving and pushing just to find nightgown, robes, bras, and underwear.... no Ferbies as they would of course be in the Toy department.   I guess the smart person that said that probably had an armful at the register before the other shoppers even made it to the Toy department.  With these fun times came being yelled at, accused of hiding items, ran into, threatened, and called some pretty harsh and horrible names.  

I also remember when they used to have the special handouts/prizes for the first 100 or so shoppers.  You know like game pieces they took to the Toy department to see if they won a car. Special discounts only available in the nice grab bag the shoppers got from camping out all night and protecting their right to walk through the door before the majority of the other people.  The reality was that most of the grab bag tend to have coupons for batteries and buy one get one free.  They quit doing that sort of thing because I think it got too dangerous.  In the little town of Boise we almost had our doors broken as people were pushing people and the doors prior to opening.  I cannot imagine the amount of people that were trampled or hurt due to the greedy monster that took over others in line.

The door busting electronic!!!!  I worked different years in the electronic department.  Every year there was some stereo and camera that were priced so low that you knew you were going to run out before the second hours was done.  One year we had an abundance of the stereo so we had both sides of an entire aisle filled with them as well as eye level shelves on both sides of the outside of electronics.  We had to put the rest on "risers" or the highest shelf in electronic because there was NO way we were going to be able to have a pallet brought from all the way from the back of the store to electronics.  People started climbing the outer side of electronic - the computer game wall in Music and Movies and knocking the stereo's over on the people in that aisle.  The stupid thing was that there was still an entire aisle of them and they were knocking them over not towards them so it was nothing but dangerous.  The sad thing is that due to the cheapness, rough handling, or whatever, about half of those door busting electronics were usually returned due to not working.

Note the blonde woman looking like she is in the fight of her life.

The worse thing was being scheduled to close.  You got there when everyone is grouchy and the store is sooooo messy you don't see much of an end in sight.  You remember when I likened the opening of the doors to a game show.... well the participants seemed to split up and grab everything they could and meet back (usually by a scanner or in the girls clothing department) and go through what they had and dump a ton of stuff on the floor as it was duplicates or unwanted.  It was your job to pick it all up, sort it, and then put the stuff back in your designated area.  Plus, you still had to deal with the customers that were not finding anything left and tired as they had been up since most likely 4 am at other stores.  My favorite was that they would all be genuinely shocked that you were out of the items with the best prices or that were the hottest.  It was like they did not notice the other hundreds of people that are walking around like angry zombies too.  Only they had the idea to come out and only they knew about the sale.  Somehow you personally made it so that they would waste their time coming in just to frustrate them with this cruel joke.

Most of the time it was hard to get people to leave the store.  I think they were in some sort of hope that you would find a pallet of goods hidden or didn't want to go home disappointed.  Finally when they did go you were happy because at least if you fixed one area it would stay fixed.  Most of the time we gave up around 2 am and called it good.  The truck team came in around 4 am and fixed as they stocked some areas.  Only to hope that you were scheduled as a mid worker tomorrow because you would rather work with little sleep then have to close again.

The biggest and busiest shopping day of the year - thanks for all the memories good and bad.  And NO I am not a shopper on that day no matter the deals in the ads.

Postive Things To Remember

My mother-in-law sent a little book to my daughter titled "50 things to Always Remember" by Douglas Pagles.  It has very good up building personal sayings and thoughts to build you up.  I of course had to read it and loved a lot of the little sayings. So I guess I am using them to get myself more up built and positive. 

The one that I feel I needed right now is:

So when it seems like you're getting overlooked and under-appreciated, find some reassurance and comfort in quietly saying this:  I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be, but most people are unaware that I am so much more than what they see. 

I think most of us feel overlooked in life, especially at one time or another.  I think most of us feel under-appreciated.  We see our effort and we know our heart.  This is something that most people have no insight into.  

However, I also think we are just as guilty in judging others or feeling we know their motivations or efforts as well.  We live in a world that takes all of our energy and concentration most of the time.  Therefore, we don't get a chance to REALLY see what is going on with others.  Therefore, we assume we know and are easily let down.  I know that some of my own frustration is in not understanding why some don't act as though they care.  Maybe they do but all their energy and effort is tied up in something else that is taking priority in their life.  Maybe they don't care.

Bottom line is that I have to worry about me.  Easier said than done.  However, I do know I have a very wonderful heart and that I am more than what most people see (some because they don't want to and others because they can't).  

A Change and Some Reflection

CHANGE:

So Jo started using her's to blog about her trip and well I am a follower of what they are doing because I love them and wish I was there. This turn got me to think about my blog. I am going to use it more often. It may be me venting or it may be me just thinking out loud. I just have so much in my head that I need it to go somewhere. I guess this is as good a place as any. Plus people don't have to read it if they don't want to.

I think in a round about way I try to vent or express discontent just to get it out on Facebook, but then all that does is get a lot of people either mad, confused, or I don't really say what I want to. This is public but much more private and I can handle that. It is a journal that IF someone is interested in they can look at it but is won't pop up in their face for them to scan when they don't want to.

REFLECTION:

This has been a very challenging year for so many people. For me I lost my grandpa, my other grandpa that I was trying to get some information from as he has not been in my life since I was small,my great uncle, my grandma (who I miss more than I thought I would), a friend decided to take his life, and I recently loss my dog. Ugh. Lots of loss. It is funny because I think with the loss of each, yep even the dog, I have gained a different perspective on other things in my life. I feel the loss but I also see what I had and feel fortunate in other areas.

With the passing of my grandfathers I learned that life is too short to hold a grudge. Time marches on whether fences are mended or not. Each person has their own regrets and their own triumphs... but the score ceases to matter after a while.

I think with my grandma I gained the perspective of how a quiet person can have such an impact on others. I learned that you can be loving to others and still stand by your convictions. Consistency and real love can make all the difference even though each person around you is caught up in their own problems. I've learned what it really meant to have a grandparent and realized that she has been the one true consistence in my life in that regard.

With the loss of a friend to suicide I learned that you have to not judge and realize we never know what each person is dealing with regardless of a smile on their face. I also learned that holding stuff in can't be good for you. I think the most important thing I learned and need to remind myself is, that I have outgrown some immaturity and the desire to be in the "in" crowd with the people I grew up with. Life isn't a popularity contest and the people that really care will not always be the people you think of when the word "friend" comes up.

Sadly the loss of my dog taught me to not take things for granted. Most of all it taught me that I am responsible and brave when it comes to doing what needs to be done even if it hurts and makes me cry.

The last big impact this year has been with my tumor in my uterus. The stress and worry that came from and still comes from that was more than what I could voice. I felt like if I discussed it then I was a "drama queen" or that others felt they needed to compete. I still have to deal with this even after the surgery. I have an appointment with an oncologist due to the tumor testing results finding it a Borderline Serous Ovarian Tumor which is but is not cancer... (I don't know it is all confusing). I have to meet with this doctor and it may be just an education about what it was and what to look for if the other ovary starts to act up... or it could be more depending on what she recommends. Part of me just wants to avoid and the other part wants to be as proactive as possible. I know it could be worse and I shouldn't complain, but I need to somewhere don't I. Can't I be upset that life isn't fair and somethings continue to just frustrate me in this 33 year old body.

**** But I have learned about who is really there for ME and who is there for show****
I am blessed in that way.

This year (as in previous years) has made me very aware of what a wonderful and loving husband I have. He is my rock and even when he doesn't know what to do or say he finds a way of showing me that he loves me very much.